a thing about honesty

September 5, 2009 at 2:20 PM 4 comments

I’m new to blogging but definitely not new to H!P. This means that there is a LOT to keep up with. I’ll try to skip the boring parts (I’m talking about you, miss I-want-to-shove-the-piano-up-her-ass-without-Vaseline) and focus on some awesomeness slash weirdness cause that’s how things are delivered here at H!P Café. Just look at the man.

I'm kreeeejziiiiii \(>o<)/

I'm kreeeejziiiiii \(>o<)/

So today folks I’ll discuss the issue of idol characters. What the hell is that?! Well, children it’s  a long story. Long, long time ago, when Maiha was still the boring one in Berryz and ‘an hero’, there was the harem of Japanese pop starlets. They were innocent like Risako’s mountains, sweet like the Airi’s ass and honest. The last adjective is extremely important. Honest. It had consequences. Rika Ishikawa started the concert with “Look at me, you fucking perverted old men!” You make me sick!’ while dressed as an ugly hooker. img20061127122152

A gag reflex was a popular food reaction.



Kamei screamed ‘Fuck U byczez you must be crazy to think that I might ride this death machine’ when offered a rollercoaster fun.

R U crazy?!

R U crazy?!

Where the inhabitants of this land happy? Was Tsunku’s pocket full of cash? The surprising answer is NO.

major surprise !

major surprise !

Everything about Idol World is FAKE. It’s not a very original thought, but oh well XD There is a bunch of girls in the group and variety is the mother of success (ka-ching, baby). Sayumi might be the frigging genius of mathematics but she’s forced to act like a complete idiot. I remember when Kusumi where-is-that-miracle?! Koharu joined MM and was asked bluntly by some guy about her character in the group. Cute or cool? She obviously wanted the cool one. It didn’t quite turned this way. ‘Honey, we’re sooo sorry. Just stick to KONNINICHIPAKONKONKONNINICHIPAAAAAAAAA.’

kohapinku nyu chan dessu ~^o^~

kohapinku nyu chan dessu ~^o^~

Reina in some radio show or something mentioned switching into her idol mode before the concert. My question is: does this mode include winking like madman and sticking out your hand with a constant pout plastered to your face? I’m scared to think how her lovemaking mode looks like. It might be quite the similiar O.o DRAMATIC. Btw, I do think she is a chair rapist. One passionate kiss is the best piece of evidence. I got it on camera.

gimme a chair

gimme a chair

There are many more examples of plastic idol modes. But do you really, and I mean REALLY, want it to be otherwise? Do you want H!P to be only about true music straight from the heart and moving lyrics? Ok, we may grumble about cheesy poses, fake smiles, cheap PVs, Tsunku’s craziness and exaggerated reactions to plastic vegetables on a rope touching your face.

OMFG a plastic radish!!!!!

OMFG a plastic radish!!!!!

It is entertainment. At least a Japanese version of entertainment. But another thing, the more interesting one, is believing in the honesty of the idol mode. Yep, it’s true. I bet that many of you (me included) discuss idols as if they were acting their true selves. Takitty screaming her lungs of in a ghost house does it for YOUR and MY pleasure (sounds nice …). Sayumi blurts out silly comments so you could laugh, call her ‘baka’ and ‘kawaii’ at the same time. Momoko sucks on helium and bulges her veins out just for you (I would say, no thank you Momo)

Those veins pump me up with helium

Those veins pump me up with helium

When I say that I don’t like Momo I say that I hate how she acts out her idol mode. I don’t know her personally! Who cares?! But when a new girl is added into a group and I hear ppl saying : ‘I wonder how her personality will develop? She seems so shy right now’. And I begin to wonder, do you ppl really believe that she will work on showing her TRUE personality? Come on. Even the girls themselves are blunt about their charas. Listen to some MC or Radio Shows or whatever. And here’s the personal note. I’m largely into acting. I attend a drama club and I love being on stage, all the possibilities. I must admit that H!P acting is awful but it’s music industry and not  a theatre 😀 There is a thick borderline between stage and real life (I luv Edward but I wouldn’t throw myself at Robert Pattinson begging him to bite me… or would I? XD). It’s all pretending. As long as we are aware of this it’s fine. I can grumble about crazy helium Momo or drunk Kohapinku but love them at the same time for the sake of variety. Some girls are truly horrible about their idol modes. Momo is at least consistent. What about LinLin? No comments … for now 😀 I’ll get to her soon enough:D

I touched upon many issues. Wow, it’s quite a post for a first time. 😀 I might develop these ideas later. But as for now thank you for reading 😀


Listening to : Ongaku Gatas ‘Osakini Sunzurei’

Entry filed under: Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , .

Let the party begin XD Nyu chan desu?!

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. zush  |  September 7, 2009 at 5:22 PM

    Every day I come to this conclusion that our life is a non-stop drama with ever changing walk-on actors. So when talkin about idols it’s then a drama in a much larger drama. Actors we are all in our wacky ways.

    Seriously, there are moments when you can see behind the role characters of idols but those moments are sure quite rare in the media. I think you can catch some of those “natural” seconds for example from Berryz Kobo’s Making of and back stage clips.

    Yep, you can always question what’s real and what’s not. Or is that even relevant question any more?

    By da way; I liie your style of writing. Added your blog to BKI’s blogroll.

    • 2. ladybird  |  September 7, 2009 at 5:46 PM

      Yes, you’re right about those rare natural moments. That’s why I like to watch ‘Makings of’ 😀 Thank you for your compliment. It means a lot to me, Zush.

  • 3. Kishiko  |  September 8, 2009 at 11:05 PM

    Yeah, watching the Makingu vids is a good way of getting at least some idea of the members’ true personality. The TV shows may also provide some “true moments” however very rarely.

    And I wish Tsugunaga could reduce the amount of helium she consumes..

    • 4. ladybird  |  September 9, 2009 at 3:27 PM

      Momo is addicted. She just can’t help it 😀


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